Beyond Exasperation

Fathers, don't exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master.
Ephesians 6:4 from Eugene Peterson's paraphrase The Message

"I think his parents were just exacerbating him all the time," my friend mentioned about her husbands' tumultuous growing years. That was the first time Ephesians 6:4 really clicked for me (I know--it's probably obvious to everyone else...). "Of course!" I thought to myself--"exacerbation." That's the word for the thing we've been trying to avoid in our parenting. Beyond it is how we are trying to live in partnership with the Holy Spirit.

I'm so happy to say that in many respects our life in South Lake Union is turning into one that is beyond exasperation.

Some people comment that South Lake Union isn't very family friendly, what with all the traffic and warehouses and office parks and photos of hip young adults. But it's hard for us to imagine a place that's more family friendly. We don't need a big house with a big yard to have the burden of taking care of alone. We need a functional private space that is surrounded by an active neighborhood.

Cascade People's Center/Playground/P-Patch is not only a safe place where our whole family is welcome to be and find support, but also a place where we can interact with a great diversity of neighbors. Many of them stop and take time to engage in a sincere relationship not only with me and Josh, but (drum roll...) our girls.

For the most part, life is integrated. We see most of the people in our life in more than one context. Josh walks to and from work very quickly and can easily join us for lunch, which opens up valuable time for me to be involved in projects outside our family and for the all important Daddy time. And most importantly, it's all a give and take. We're not here to serve or be served, but both. Everyone has something to give, including us and people making their bed for the night in the P-Patch across the street.

Living in the midst of that meaningful connection feels like life as it should be. Even as lately we feel alone in our identity as people of God in this place, we feel like we're smack in the middle of the work of God. We are beyond the exasperation of trying to find a way to use our gifts, trying to conjure up support in being a family, trying to form contexts for integration. We may get angry or annoyed, but without becoming exasperated anger or annoyance can be used to birth new life, new refinement in our community, new arenas for others to discover life beyond exasperation.